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Wednesday, May 30

Spell.

Free verse.

There's something so beautiful about the silence that surrounds us. There's something so beautiful about the freedom that I feel in those little moments, when the sky is falling into me, folding me into little squares. And that's where I wait for you. Always waiting for you.

Your breathing reminds me of the beating of the drums. The drums that used to echo through the night air so many summers ago, a constant reminder that I was alive. You remind me that I am alive.

--

I'm way too tired to be comprehensible. I wonder if a clean room directly leads to a better life. Let's see, shall we?

--

"I know that waiting is all you can do. Sometimes."

--

Forever is heaven. Wishing. I read that somewhere, except it was more structured and I was more awake. Less hot, though. It's so hot outside and inside and on my back. I wonder what would happen if I shaved my head. It would be like being naked all the time, except not at all. I wonder if it would give people direct insight into my thoughts; if it would make me easier to understand. Sometimes, I would much rather people just enter my head and look around instead of having me explain things. Sometimes, I rather hug than talk. Sometimes. Sometimes. Sometimes.

Everything seems to be conditional.
Everything is conditional.
I don't want to be selfish.

What you said to me about a year ago always clings to the inside of my brain, entering my conscious at random times. And it saddens me. Because I don't just want this to be about myself. I want it to be about that other person too. I don't agree with you. I don't think relationships are all about making yourself happy. I don't believe that at all.

It's caring about someone so much that their happiness is just as important as your own. It's connecting with someone on such a deep level that their happiness is directly interwined with your own.

I don't agree with you at all.

--

Okay. I'm going to clean. Seriously, this time.

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