Home About Me Contact Tumblr

Wednesday, August 22


All of a sudden, I am scared. I am sad. I am so, so sad. How is it that one day, we just get up and leave? After being fed, being held, being consoled, being encouraged to not let the world get us down, we turn our backs and leave. Walk out the door and bother to call only when we spot that oh-so cute top we just need to have but don't have the money for.

I don't understand. I've tried all my life to fight change, to fight death, the death of relationships, of phases of my life, of loved ones, of hopes. Why must things die? So that things can progress. So that things can be born. I know all about the cycle of life, okay? So don't look at me like that.

But still. I am saddened. This summer has been full of goodbyes. And now I am sayng my final ones. The most important ones. Three thousand miles. I have always been mentally isolated from them; but the three thousand miles of physical seperation makes it permanent.

What does goodbye mean? What does any of it mean, except for another sleepless night, another pointless blogpost? Rien. Rien. Je n'ai rien pas.

No comments: