Home About Me Contact Tumblr

Tuesday, December 4

Oh geez.

It was a fairly normal conversation, as far as conversations with my mother go. We talked about some family gossip, my addiction to chocolate, and she called me all sorts of embarrassing Punjabi pet names that I dare not repeat on the interweb. Then, just when I thought we were summing up the conversation, she says, very suddenly, "I am going to enter you into the Miss. Punjaban contest next year."

We had just been talking about a girl from that contest, which I had not even heard of up until last night, so I laughed, thinking (And desperately hoping) that she was kidding.  She laughed too, but then she stopped abruptly and said, "I've already talked to your dad about it. He agrees."

I was completely flabbergasted, to say the least. I stuttered. I spit out my Jones Soda. I flapped my arms around in a very confused manner. "But -- uh-- what?" 

"Yeah! We think you would look so pretty in your sari! And you're so tall! Not to mention smart! You're so smart!"

"Mom. I think the main point of this competition is being Punjaban. They'd ask me all of these cultural questions about Punjab that I wouldn't know."

"Well, we'd train you, of course! Your grandma already said you could live with her and she would train you! It would be perfect."

So apparently the entire family had been asked if this would be okay except for me. At that point, I had nothing to say to her. I just asked if she was serious a few more times, and each time she answered, "Why wouldn't I be serious?"

I don't have any way to sufficiently summarize this entry except with a whiney: I don't wanna.

No comments: